This cup of espresso even tasted a little bitter tonight. I sipped a bit by bit, looked for sweet tastes that left from those tiny bubbles dregs around my cup. This Cafe was likely, I visited before. That yellow blurry light, Straw huts, Lavender-scented candles, also bossa jazz music playing along. Everything looks the same, but not with you. I can’t find your pretty face, I found you nothing. You were not there again.

I have been visited this place for a month, when the night begin, until midnight still. I was always sitting at the table we sat before, We always reserved this table if we decided to date. The Café and library had never been so far, so I always able to ride my bicycle to went here. If usually, I let you to ride this old bicycle with me, I ride by myself. I always in hurry when I went there, Imagine, all along in my way, My mind keep wondering, there is someone dying cause of tired waiting for me, tried to kill herself with many cups of cappuccino, act as a grumpy cat with an ugly face. I hate waiting, I hate make people waits. Neither you.

Sometimes if I go home earlier, and bought some flowers in a florist shop next to the city library where I worked. Hey, don’t test my memories, I still remember the flower you most like. Lavenders. The smell is mostly like those aromatic candles in the cafe, maybe they bought them in this florist shop too. And, I still remember, the lavenders perfume you always use. The purple Dress you always wear, same color like lavenders. A couple of crocs wrapped your tiny feet. Yeah I wasn’t surprises, if you and purple were sisters. I have no idea why my eyes suddenly started to blind if I get too close with you. Well, I can’t make any different, about purple, about you, and lavenders too. They all looked the same.

Those lavenders I put it on a vase, up in our table. I disposed all yesterday lavenders, that have wilted before. I filled the vase with mineral water I purposely brought here. Now, they look freshly like the one we picked up in our flowers garden. Then, I waved to barista near the cashier tables, and suddenly my espresso have already been served. They  have known me so well and always put a smile while delivering my coffee, to me, to their loyal customers. “Welcome!”, she said, so shy with red flush scrambled on her face. “Thanks”, then.

Another night in November. When The Sky cried too much rain. Unfortunately, I left my umbrella in the library, and had to wait till the rain stopped. Well, I think I’ll have another cup of espresso, and have more time for daydreaming. While I started to write another verse of poems, to heal my broken heart.

“There was a time when rain forced us to wait, to count  grains of longing. Remembering a pool of memories, Adoring the sweetness of suppositions.”

Then Suddenly, my eyes flooded by tears, and I winked to block it anyways. Many times, I held my tears to not come out again, but my eyelids were never strong to hold out my sorrows that overflows into a cries. Today, Tonight, The last time I met you baby. The last time I held your tiny hands, the last time I hugged you tighter than ever, the last time I saw your eyes as blue as the sky, and deep like the ocean. But tonight won’t be my last night to wait. At least after you left me, and brake my heart, only for his poor love.

This is the truth, I only had a little piece of your heart, The large one was belonging to him you love the most. “I came to you, and you left me. I hugged you, and you backed me.”. Even, Desolation cut off your throat muted. And Only silence sewn your words, jailed on your lips. You didn’t dare to speak, but one words. The only one sentence that you said to me, ”See you tomorrow dear”, then your smile blossomed on your face. But, tomorrow, you never came. You were missing.

For The Dearest one. If you can hear me in your heart now. This espresso is still bitter. But my waits will be sweet.

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